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10 Happiness Handicaps You Need To Break in 2020

Happiness handicaps are thoughts or belief patterns that we consciously or unconsciously think about and we add into our mental faculty, draining us of peace and contentment. We allow this beautiful gift of bliss to go away in exchange for opinions, social norms, memories, regret, and so many others. And with the same hands we pay for temporary ways to achieve this state of peace. 

This was exactly my life until I realized the secret place inside. It took a lot of work but here are 10 things that may keep your energy imbalanced that only you can fix.

1. Grudges

Being wronged, cheated, abused, or taken advantage of in anyway can not be seen as good. But, a worse thing is to extend the pain from a past experience into the present moment by deciding to carry it. The more you dwell on a grudge the more it grows, thickens, and widens. Grudges are built by bricks of conviction. Brick by brick until we can no longer hear one another and we choose to misinterpret or dismiss any and all contact. 

In many cases you can smash the wall with forgiveness, in cases where that isn’t possible, it’s best to leave the wall behind and forgive the situation, the persons’ involved and most importantly yourself for whatever role you played and move forward. This will allow that stagnant energy to move and transform something new for you in the future given that your mindset Is open in creating good.

2. Envy

In this age of social media everyday we look at things that seem to be greener pastures. Sometimes you get a bit closer and realize it was not all it seemed to be. Let it be understood that envy focused the mind on lack and not abundance, it has us thinking of what we don’t have in some sense. Since this is triggered by someone else having and showing or by simply observing we must train ourselves. This thought pattern can be demotivating and paralyzing when seen from the wrong perspective. When you see this pattern be grateful to have NOW observed it and start disassociating your value with the experiences of others. Start to count your blessings if you haven’t been and set a new standard for what should be heavily valued in your life. 

3. Withdraw 

Withdraw is tricky, mainly because the mind can trick you to justify your lack of involvement in your own life. The meaning making machine in our heads does a lot of funny stuff. Withdraw is when you remove your passion from life. At times this can be caused by the fear of rejection -> which often stems from a poor self image.. needing to have the approval of others. You can turn this off by finding ways to EXPRESS YOURSELF! I’m not yelling at you, but if you don’t want anyone  to know its you make a blog on tumblr or instagram. If you are feeling brave, make videos about things you like or give people your gift with a business. You owe it to yourself to do what makes you feel good. 

4. Worry 

Compulsive worry turns into a habit of worrying. Worry is a dangerous mental program if not used with wisdom. Be careful to allow worried to become a part of your lifestyle. Its better to find new ways to excite your imagination with positive visualizations. Like a child would, use “positive what if‘s” to imagine the best case scenario you would want present in your life experience. Using worry in the negative sense sends a signal to the universe calling for that which we do not want to occur. The worry thought is like a bank account and the more you worry it fills up and you get the cashout which ends up being the idea behind the worry itself.

Another way to see it would be in a case where you wanted to hear from a friend and you sent them several texts and calls and they don’t answer and one moment they just show up at your house. 

5. Laziness

Laziness has many different forms you can perceive it as intellectual laziness or physical. Make time every day to engage your mind with stimulating content, it is good to get new and different types of stimulation each day. For the body choose to take a walk at the least each day even if it’s only a 10 minute walk. Starting the day with two minutes of jumping jacks really assess and getting the blood flowing in the heart pumping. Abraham Maslow’s said “Humans are happiest when learning new skills, making new discoveries…” engage your mind with content that inspires you and get yourself moving! Even if that means a 10 minute walk in the park.

6. Selfishness 

There are different degrees to this concept because it is necessary at times to focus on the craft that the universe is shaping you into thought your experiences. We are centering on the idea of an individual who is overly self absorbed, greedy, and fearful of losing what they have at the same time. Someone who hoards and hoards for the sake of having. One that is Strict on reserving for them selves and rarely gives unless they have to. When they do give they tend to expect an immediate compensation and lastly when they must pay they look for always want a discount no matter what business they are supporting. Selfishness at the root is fear, the universe is plentiful. Giving makes the world go round. Give with gladness and you will receive with gladness… even when you are paying bills.

7. Goalessness

Not having an aim in life leaves you unable to direct yourself. Your intuition normally tells you have to further your life if you ask and listen for that. All organisms have a built in guidance system kind of like a GPS in a car. Yea, that’s your intuition. If you ignore your guidance system for too long it will surely manifest unhappiness. You will feel unfulfilled or find yourself in places that do not fill you with joy, or in situations that you are not pleased with. 

When moving towards a goal that is meaningful is just like stepping out of a dark room into the light. The light lets you know that there is hope, that there is a way to continue. When you stay in that dark room you feel small and insignificant. That feeling grows on you unless you leave. Eventually you will shrink to the size of a green pea. The best part is that, even at the size of a pea, you can still leave. 

8. Ignorance and Stupidity 

It is difficult for people within this section to find happiness because they have rejected the essence of knowledge and understanding. Ignorance is the lack of knowledge or information, stupidity is more intense level of absence of knowledge. It includes when you are unaware, you realize you are unaware and yet you continue to do things that keep you in the dark. At the end of each day you can ask yourself this question: “What did i learn today?”. And if you don’t have an answer just yet on that day, come back to and see what’s new. You can also enroll in online courses that teach you skills that you desire to know well. Always keep your brain engaged with ideas and concepts that expand you’re thinking and excite you. 

9. Unhappy Associations 

Carrying the dead weight of others is a sure way to be burdened with unhappiness. Many of the time we find ourselves bending our backs or over extending ourselves for people who do not reciprocate an equal level of energy exchange. These engagements tend to be displeasing and draining. 

No external person or situation can ever keep you happy. That is your job. Other people can only help to extend your already happy self, you have to make yourself happy. Every minute spent with people that inspire you is a minute invested into your creative future. Every minute spent in the mind of an unhappy person is a minute thrown away in the trash. Be happy and bring people into your world instead of going into theirs. 

10. Stress and Tension 

Not all stress is bad, it’s important to see both sides of all things. Stress is helpful towards the process of growth. Resistance helps us to grow stronger but constant stress does not help. Stress can trigger experiences like anxiety, if you are unable to relax due to these physical experiences we may need to do some mindfulness work. This feeling of stress can be triggered by different things for different people. Some are stressed because they may be stuck at a job is not helping them grow as an individual. For another, it stems from not having the happiness they desire in their relationships.